Amidst Health Concerns, Bernie Sanders Takes Huge Risk Booking ‘The Strokes’ for Latest Rally

By Hannah Kotler

NEW HAMPSHIRE—Following a trip to the hospital not too long ago for heart complications, Senator Bernie Sanders has been healthy and hitting the campaign trail in preparation for the upcoming election. That all may soon come crashing down as Sanders sent out a concerning notice of an appearance of “The Strokes” at his latest campaign rally in Durham, New Hampshire. A spokesperson for Team Bernie had this to say in clarification: “We would like to reiterate the tip top condition Senator Sanders is in health-wise and clarify that he is not, in fact, having a stroke, but will be speaking alongside the band The Strokes.”

While opposing candidates will no doubt weaponize the connection between Sanders and The Strokes, his supporters seem thrilled at the chance to see these two forces in action. Skidmo’ spoke with one Skidmore student, Heather Cort, about her plan to skip class on Monday, the day of the event, to attend the rally: “This is definitely a once in a lifetime opportunity to see three things I just have to experience in my lifetime: Bernie Sanders, The Strokes, and Bernie Sanders before he has a stroke. I mean, what more could you ask for!”

At press time, Sanders himself could not be reached, as he was reportedly practicing a surprise guitar solo to played at tonight’s event.