


East Coast Liberal Begrudgingly Admits He Also Didn’t Know Kansas City Was In Missouri

All I Want for Christmas is a Whole Bunch of Fertilizer and Don’t Ask Any Fucking Questions

Can This Guy Catch a Break? Drake Gets Knee Caps Whapped with Lead Pipes at Camp Flog Gnaw 2

Wal-Mart Yodeling Kid Harvests Own Plasma During Instagram Live-Stream in Desperate Attempt to Regain National Attention

Top 10 Fluids Seen in New Film “The Lighthouse”

In Other News, Students No Longer Allowed to Abbreviate Murray-Aikins Dining Hall to D-Hall

Pre-Med Student Declares Anthropology Minor in Last-Ditch Effort to Get a Personality

Disheartened Club President Already Stopped Putting Up Flyers for Events
